Love, Lost in Translation

Can love get lost in translation?

Lately, I have been thinking about how love could sometimes get lost in translation. Not because it does not exist or there is a lack of effort, but because two people can love each other and still struggle to feel it in the way they need to.

I have had conversations about how relationships require compromise, patience, and intentional effort. The conversations are often honest and well-meaning, but sometimes, they stay just that: conversations. The action, the follow-through, the living out of those words can fall short.

What I’ve come to understand is that showing love does not look the same for everyone. I have my way of expressing love, but that’s what it is, my way.  For someone else, love might look different. Maybe it’s quiet acts of service, consistency, or a type of support that isn’t the same as mine. Neither way is wrong. But it becomes difficult when those expressions aren’t mutually understood. When someone is giving their best in a language I don’t naturally speak or understand, it can feel like there’s a disconnect, like their love is being spoken in a dialect I’ve never learned to interpret.

That’s when the questions creep in. “Why can’t you just…?” or “If you cared, wouldn’t you…?” The frustration doesn’t come from a lack of love, but from the absence of familiar signs of it. The truth is that love doesn’t always arrive in the form we expect. And when it doesn’t, we might miss it entirely, not because it wasn’t there, but because we could not see it for what it was.

Compromise isn’t just about doing things differently; it’s about learning what love looks like to the other person. It’s about asking: “Am I loving you in a way that feels like love to you?” and being open to hearing that the answer might be “not quite.” Honestly, I'm still learning that and trying to make it work even when I do not understand.

It’s a hard but necessary truth: someone can love you and you can still not feel loved, not because they don’t care, but because the translation was off.

I’m still learning how to sit with that and still figuring out how to bridge the gap between my intentions and my actions because sometimes, the hardest part isn’t loving someone; it’s making sure they feel it.

Today's post was in the context of romantic relationships. However, as I was editing, I saw a video posted by Toni Tone about managing conflict in friendships, and I thought, "Maybe what I wrote today isn't just about romantic relationships." It can be applied to all relationships because, regardless of their nature, all relationships require effort, respect, and patience.

I hope the love you give and the one you receive is never "lost in translation".